Joke!Joke!Joke!

[ToNgUe-TiEd]

Share to us your favorite jokes!!! ;D

[ToNgUe-TiEd]

TEACHER: Class, naniniwala ba kayong may diyos?
CLASS: Yes!!!
TEACHER: Nakikita nyo ba ang diyos?
CLASS: Hindi po!!!
TACHER: Kung ganun!!! Eh di walang diyos!!!
STUDENT: Classmates! naniniwala ba kayong may utak si sir?!
CLASS: OO!!
STUDENT: Nakikita nyo ba utak ni sir?
CLASS: Hinde!!
STUDENT: Kung ganun!!! WALANG UTAK SI SIR! ;D

[SoulEdge]

here's one sign i saw in one of the meatshops here in cebu city:

FRESH FROZEN CHICKEN FOR SALE

[ToNgUe-TiEd]

Doctor: I need a sample of your urine, stool, semen.
Old Man to Wife: Ano daw ang kailangan niya?
Wife: Ibigay mo na lang ang brief mo! ;D

[deadpoet]

ahaha!!!

[Ironman]

ahem wla nay lain joke?

[iceTea]

naay lain oh.....
[glow=green,2,300]JOKE[/glow]

[ToNgUe-TiEd]

FPJ Jokes! ;D

Bush, FPJ and Erap are talking about crime.
Bush: How is your PAROLE system over there?
FPJ: Oh, we hang them every Christmas.
ERAP: Pare, tama ka, ganon din ang sagot ko!


FPJ walking in NY.
Prosti 1: Do you like handjob?
FPJ: No, thanks.
Prost 2: Psst. Like blowjob?
FPJ: No, thanks. Dapat pala, dito sa NY nagpupunta ang
mga OCW natin. Ang daming JOB openings!


Erap and FPJ, on the way to Disneyland, see a sign
that reads: "DISNEYLAND LEFT."
ERAP: Sayang, hindi natin naabutan.
FPJ: O nga, agahan na lang natin bukas.


NEWS BREAK! Nagkasakit si FPJ sa kakaisip ng
solusyon sa mga problema ng Pilipinas. LIBRENG SINE pa lang ang naiisip
niya.


Erap wrote an order to the grocer: "Please send me 2
goose."
Erap: Mali ata.
Sulat uli: "Please send me 2 gooses." Mm... mali rin
a.
FPJ: Pare, ganito na lang ang isulat mo: "Please send
me 1 goose. P.S. - at isa pa!"


FPJ & Erap in a museum. (FPJ looking at a mummy)
FPJ: Pare, ano'ng ibig sabihin nitong 1300 B.C.?
Erap: Pare, yan ang plate number ng nakabangga sa
kanya.

;D

[ToNgUe-TiEd]

Stupid Questions ;D

1) Should Vegetarians eat animal crackers?

2) Do you find it a bit unnerving doctors call what they do practice?

3)If a funeral procession is at night, do you drive with your lights off?

4) If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?

5) If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?

6) When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs?

7) When you open a bag of cotton balls, is the top one meant to be thrown away?

8)Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

;D

[ToNgUe-TiEd]

More Stupid Questions... ;D

1) Are children who act in rated 'R' movies allowed to see them?

2) Can you make a candle out of your earwax?

3) When French people swear do they say pardon my English?

4) Aren't the 'good things that come to those who wait' just the leftovers from the people that got there first?

5) If the swat team breaks down your door do they have to replace it later?

6)Can a fire truck park in the fire lane?

7) Can it be cloudy and foggy at the same time?

8) "Cute as a button" Is that supposed to be a compliment? Since when are buttons cute?

9) Are marbles made of marble?

10) Why does the last piece of ice always stick to the bottom of the cup?

11) Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out"?

12) Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken over there ... I'm gonna eat the first thing that comes out if its butt"?

13) Isn't Disney World just a people trap operated by a mouse?

14) If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

15) Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet soup?

16) Can you get cornered in a round room?

17) Why do we wash behind our ears? Who really looks there?

18) Why don't the hairs on your arms get split ends?

19) If an atheist has to go to court, do they make him swear on the Bible?

20) Why is it illegal to park in a handicapped parking space but its ok to use a handicapped toilet?

21) "Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in mother in law, they come out to Woman Hitler?"

22) Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning 'many' in Latin, and 'tics' as in 'bloodsucking creatures’?

23) Why is it that when you get out of a swimming pool, your urine is hotter when you use the restroom?

24) If a fork were made of gold would it still be considered silverware?

25) If heat rises, then shouldn't hell be cold?

26) Do they have girl’s bathrooms in gay bars?

27) Why is toilet bowl cleaning liquid only blue?

28) Why is it when we talk to God we are praying, but when God talks to us we are put into the loony bin?

29) Why do dogs sniff other dog’s bottoms to say hello?

30) If something "goes without saying," why do people still say it?

;D

[Ironman]

why did the chicken cross the road?

[fetus]

Mga Tanong:

1. Anong country ang hip-hop?

2. Anong hayop ang hindi palaging sure?

3. Anong hayop ang tama pero hindi parin sure?

4. Anong hayop ang dinadaongan ng barko?

5. Anong hayop ang lumulutang sa tubig?

6. Anong hayop ang hindi hayop pero mukha siyang hayop?

Para sa mga sagot, mag message ka sa akin para malaman mo. Pag hindi, magtiis ka at magdusa! hahaha.

[iceTea]

so unsay mga answers? kelangan bah mag-pm gyud?

[fetus]

of course, kailangan talagang mag message sa akin o di kaya'y mag e-mail nalang, sapagkat ang mga tanong na iyang ay copyright protected, Dorm's Carabao English 2004. samakatwid, ang mga yan ay basta-basta lamang ginawa.



hindi ako nagbibiro!

[iceTea]

sige mag-pm ra ko nimo...pero later na kung feel na nako...

Hindi raw bingi.
Kustomer: (sumisigaw) PABILI NG HOPE!!
Tindero: Huwag kang sumigaw! Hindi ako bingi!
Ilang Coke ba ang bibilhin mo?

hala sige gitika inyo self....